The website did not help me find my Prince Farming. I also realized that FarmersOnly might not be for me when I saw this description of a dream date: I do NOT want to work in manure. I needed to get back to city folk ASAP. Sizzl is an app sponsored by Oscar Meyer that matches people based on their bacon preference. Then in college, I read too much Michael Pollan and mostly stopped eating meat.
But despite being a mostly-vegetarian-except-in-cases-of-drunkenness-or-dumplings, I signed up. First, I took a quiz about bacon preferences.
leondumoulin.nl/language/art/7262-taking-flight.php That last answer was a lie, but no one wants to date a bacon taker. My future boyfriend could find out the truth at a later date. We all have to fib a little when it comes to love and pork. When you match with someone, you hear a bacon-sizzle sound, which made me hungry for bacon. My matches must have also been hungry for love.
Bumble is like Tinder, except women speak first, eliminating the surprise dick-pic greeting. Which is great, except for part where I have to talk first.
But making the first move ALL the time was a bit exhausting. Bumble had the best-looking and most accomplished men of all the sites, so I started swiping yes to almost all of them. Luckily, I was saved at the last minute. So I demanded that she help with a phone-number exchange. Does it still count if you get a little IRL help?
An alarming number of guys on Bumble have profile pictures with President Obama. Also, lots of guys have opinions on the Oxford comma in their bios, which, as a writer, I appreciate but find confusing. Score reveals photos after determining if someone is compatible with you via a short quiz. But it kept matching me with people who were between 30 and miles away. If I wanted to commute, I would date someone in Oakland.
I love beards and would like to live somewhere where men are required by law to have them. Photo courtesy of Giuseppe Milo. Sign in Get started.
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